Convergence Book 2 - Early Readers Wanted!

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Convergence Book 2 - Early Readers Wanted!

Postby Zen » Wed Aug 31, 2016 2:46 pm

Okay, I've got a few chapters done on Book 2 of Convergence and I'd really like to have a few people take a read and see if they see things that don't make sense or if the story doesn't hold together. If you haven't read book 1, I'll send also send a link with the full first book when I get the link up. Please let me know if you have time to help me out. I will be doing a few chapters at a time. (I'll have about 5 chapters ready to send soon.)
"The lines between kindness, apathy, and thickheadedness can be very thin." - Nakatani Nio Sensei
“The direction of escape is toward freedom. So what is ‘escapism’ an accusation of?” - Ursula K. Le Guin
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Re: Convergence Book 2 - Early Readers Wanted!

Postby Zen » Sun Sep 04, 2016 3:22 pm

Okay, I have an "Early Reader" version up to chapter 5 of "Convergence: Book 2 - Coalesce/Collapse" (The official title of book 1 is "Convergence: Book 1 - Approach/Avoidance). It includes the old glossary which has a lot of things from book 1 but that aren't mentioned in this book yet, but might be. (Eventually I will go through and clean it up and I am adding things in, like the German word for "Alderwoman" which I got to add during a scene in Nazi Chicago! Given Reichstaat is my term for "State of the Reich, I wasn't too surprised that "Councilwoman or Alderwoman is "Stadträtin" Seems pretty similar.)

So, anyway, if any of you would like to help me out by being an "Early Reader", I would really appreciate it. I would rather not post a general link, though, since I'd like to keep track of who has what version of the document, etc...

The way I have it set up is in a Word .docx file with "Track Changes" turned on so you can just make edits and comments in the document and send it back, then I can go through it and deal with what you have suggested as I see fit. (The old "any errors remaining are my own" bit. If I choose to ignore your grammatical or thematic advice, the weight is on my head.) I've already sent the text off to Stan, my "First Reader" I guess. I am a bit concerned about chapter 5... it may be a bit edgy.

If you haven't read the first book and would like to do this for me, there are two options. The first option is to read the first book first. It is done! I can send it to you in PDF, Word Doc, Epub, Mobi, or AZW3 format (if i can get the last two to work right. I know the EPub is working).

The second option is to read the introduction to the second book, which includes a summary of what happened in the first book, but probably won't really give you the full picture.

Anyway, either post a message here or send me a PM if you are interested in helping and I'll send you the link by PM or email if you prefer. (Though you may have to give me your email address.)
"The lines between kindness, apathy, and thickheadedness can be very thin." - Nakatani Nio Sensei
“The direction of escape is toward freedom. So what is ‘escapism’ an accusation of?” - Ursula K. Le Guin
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Re: Convergence Book 2 - Early Readers Wanted!

Postby Tahlvin » Sun Sep 04, 2016 4:03 pm

Would love to read it, but I won't be able to get around to it for a few months. Have a backlog of books already, and not enough time to read right now.
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Re: Convergence Book 2 - Early Readers Wanted!

Postby Zen » Fri Sep 09, 2016 8:41 am

Doing some rewrites on the first five chapters... I decided I had some of the voices wrong... (Been too long since I wrote the characters... Also switching perspective characters differently in this book, so I got turned around in one part writing the wrong universes' character and need to make sure I corrected it everywhere... sigh...)

So, the upshot is, if I've sent you a copy, ignore what I've sent...
"The lines between kindness, apathy, and thickheadedness can be very thin." - Nakatani Nio Sensei
“The direction of escape is toward freedom. So what is ‘escapism’ an accusation of?” - Ursula K. Le Guin
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Re: Convergence Book 2 - Early Readers Wanted!

Postby Zen » Tue Oct 04, 2016 9:37 am

So, I'm approaching the end of book 2 now... I am going to repeat my request for early readers if anybody is interested. I expect I will finish the first draft within the next week. (This part of the story has actually been there since the beginning... it is what started everything... The end of book 2 is where the germ of the idea that became Convergence began. It is the reason for many of the differences between the universes, including the fact that the British won the Continental Rebellion in the "Nazi" universe instead of the Colonists winning the Revolutionary War in the "Normal" universe. I have actually tried to stress that difference more in book two, like using the term "lift" instead of elevator. I might go back to book one and see if there is anywhere that I can change things to make the "Nazi" universe more British seeming. I'm tempted to use British spelling as well, but that would drive my spell checker nuts on my computer so I think I'll pass on that.)

Anyway, send me a private message if you would like to give me a hand!
"The lines between kindness, apathy, and thickheadedness can be very thin." - Nakatani Nio Sensei
“The direction of escape is toward freedom. So what is ‘escapism’ an accusation of?” - Ursula K. Le Guin
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Re: Convergence Book 2 - Early Readers Wanted!

Postby Zen » Sun Oct 16, 2016 11:31 am

The first draft of Book 2 is done. (Technically it might be the 2nd draft because I've gone through it and fixed a BUNCH of hideous grammar errors from spots where I rewrote paragraphs and didn't entirely get rid of the original wording or just wasn't thinking for whatever reason.)

Still in the market for early readers! :)
"The lines between kindness, apathy, and thickheadedness can be very thin." - Nakatani Nio Sensei
“The direction of escape is toward freedom. So what is ‘escapism’ an accusation of?” - Ursula K. Le Guin
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Re: Convergence Book 2 - Early Readers Wanted!

Postby Zen » Wed Nov 16, 2016 9:11 am

Here is what the cover of Convergence 2 looks like:


What do you think? (I may flip the image so the cello is on the left though... That would make the shape of the Japanese symbol for "people", but the blimp should be hitting from the left as well and that wouldn't really fit in the space well... hmmm... Nope, I think i like it like this.)
"The lines between kindness, apathy, and thickheadedness can be very thin." - Nakatani Nio Sensei
“The direction of escape is toward freedom. So what is ‘escapism’ an accusation of?” - Ursula K. Le Guin
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Re: Convergence Book 2 - Early Readers Wanted!

Postby Zen » Wed Nov 16, 2016 7:28 pm

Option 2 for the cover for book 2, having gotten some feedback from one of my professional artist friends...

The only reason I switched the direction of the instruments was actually because the new blimp (which is a model of the Hindenburg) was facing that way and I had put lettering on it so it looked wrong if I flipped it horizontally.) The main purpose of the re-do was to tone down the flames, but I also wanted a better looking blimp. And I don't mind that the instruments are now in the form of the Japanese character for "people", but I doubt that most people would notice that...

So, any opinions on which is better?
"The lines between kindness, apathy, and thickheadedness can be very thin." - Nakatani Nio Sensei
“The direction of escape is toward freedom. So what is ‘escapism’ an accusation of?” - Ursula K. Le Guin
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Re: Convergence Book 2 - Early Readers Wanted!

Postby Zen » Fri Nov 18, 2016 3:43 pm

Two more options for the Book 2 cover. These are to get rid of the "2D/3D" disparity between the map at the top and the image at the bottom.



And a bit more extreme:



Leaning toward the 2nd one. More comic looking... (I did use the "Comic" filter...)
"The lines between kindness, apathy, and thickheadedness can be very thin." - Nakatani Nio Sensei
“The direction of escape is toward freedom. So what is ‘escapism’ an accusation of?” - Ursula K. Le Guin

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